I have an EERILY SIMILAR issue:

…
('Tis involving a STAR-player for my FAVORITE NFL-team--the Denver Broncos.)

Notes: LB Von Miller (ACL) is increasing his workload at practice. ''My knee is not my issue when I'm out there,'' he said. ''It's just connecting the mind with the body and getting that reaction time down.''

… When I am "WORKING"/"EXERCISING"/"TEACHING" (Martial Arts), my MAIN-issue/-concern/-"hurdle" is my "FAULTY"/"SUB-par" LEG-strength.
(… I doN'T want to--& therefore I shaN'T--describe my LEFT-leg as "WEAK", 'cuz that IMPLIES that I lack MUSCLE there.  In ACTUALITY, my LEG-"problems" involve seriously-injured leg-"NERVES".)
(… I SUSPECTED … & my MAIN-nurse later/recently CONFIRMED … that NERVES--as opposed-to MUSCLES--take FAR-longER to RE-generate!  Hence, my "RECOVERY" has taken … 2,590 DAYS … OR 370 WEEKS … OR ~23.38% "of my LIFE "… & COUNTING … to "ENDURE"/"GUIDE".)

…
Since my--DOMESTIC--sports-teams are kinda … WHAT's the WORD?!  … HHHMMM, … "SUCKING", I spent MUCH of my day "watching the 'BOOB-TUBE'/TV" & "corresponding w/ friends via 'ELECTRONIC-POSTAGE'/EMAIL".

… I REALLY MISS PARTICIPATING-in (CONTACT-) sports!
I USED-to "play" 
ORGANIZED MARTIAL ARTS, soccer, basketball & football.
I "played" 
RECREATIONAL ping pong, bowling, "'beirut'"/"beer pong, "flip-cup", soccer, basketball & football.
I didN'T/couldN'T really "PLAY" ORGANIZED" "FOLKSTYLE-WRESTLING".  But, I devoted ALL-of "my EIGHT YEARS of EXTRAcurricular-activity" in high school AND college to WRESTLING … & EARNING my NAMESAKE … in my fraternity--"The A.J. Kaynatma Table of Competitive-Drinking".

… EXEMPLIFYING the 'Sandlot'-quote of 
"'HEROES' get REMEMBERED; 'LEGENDS' 'live FOREVER":
AFTER MY graduation, "WORD on da STREET" is that 'Sigma Alpha Epsilon'-Penn 'Theta' dedicated an ENTIRE-ROOM to ME.
(… "The A.J. Kaynatma Arena for Alcohol-Abuse")



P.S. My FAVORITE "International 'equipos de atletico' (READ as "TURKISH-soccer teams".) are gettin' ready to begin a NEW season.  WHEW!


P.P.S. I did NOT CHECK the SPANISH-meaning of THAT.  So, I'm HOPING that my "FOREIGN-memory" is "SOUND".



...

I'm STILL … TRYING!

…

"Seek PERSONAL LIBERATION."
(--Bruce Lee)


"Be ALL that you CAN be."
(--U.S. Army slogan)


… I AM an "Army of ONE".


… MOTIVATING quotes ASIDE.
I BEGAN my day (way TOO) EARLY by AWAKENING (at ~3:52 am) to my "stomach's GRUMBLING & GROWLING:.
Granted, this "INTERRUPTION in/to my SLUMBER" WAS  annoying & tiring.

"On a LIGHTER-note" (BOTH literally AND metaphorically) my "bowel-excretion SUCCESS"--for the first time in ~89.5 hours (YIKES!) was GREAT/SPECTACULAR!

1) My "DUMPAGE" IMMEDIATELY relieved me of the MILD stomach-pain I've had for the DAY or so.

2) … Said "REMNANTS" were at least "SEMI-solid" … with-OUT any "medicinal-'STIMULATION'/-'TRIGGERING'/'HELP'".

3) I could SEMI-smell the "fecal-ATROCITIES" I "left"!
(… Though I caN'T "PINPOINT" the EXACT aroma, PLEASE believe me when I EXCLAIM that it … REEKED!

… Oh, YEAH!  Three hours & 50 minutes later, "BOMBS over Baghdad" STRUCK again.
((… "WHEN 'they' ('my EXCRETORY-OUTPUT') DO--FINALLY--come, they come in BUNCHES!"))


… So, after my EARLY-morning "WORK", I was ABLE-to RE-"count some SHEEP".
((… HOWEVER/ALAS, 'twas ONLY for ~"1/32nd of the DAY" (~45 minutes).))
… Nevertheless, SUMTHIN's BETTER than NUTHIN'!


…
GOOD-stuff in OBSERVING some-of BOTH the KIDS' & ADULTS' Karate-classes "LATE-morning"/"EARLY-afternoon" today!


…
So, WAY-to-RELAX by watching ''That's My Boy'' this afternoon!


…
To any/ALL of MY DOUBTERS/HATERS:
"I caN'T be 'IM-POSSIBLE'!  I EXIST.
… I think what you MEANT to say was 'I give-up.  He's IM-PROBABLE!'"
(--Dr. Sheldon Cooper, 'The Big Bang Theory')


…
There's a BIG "MARTIAL ARTS"-seminar (entitled 'Fallen Warriors') comin' up in the next couple weeks.  In lieu of the name, I think it'd only be APPROPRIATE for (TEMPORARILY-) HANDICAPPED ME to "make an APPEARANCE".


…
I'm "TIRED" … from my EARLY-morning "Toilet-Trek".
Thus, I SHALL sleep … NOW!




...

"Is it 'NATURE' or 'NURTURE'?!"

…
In regards to my "MARTIAL ARTS"-class last night,
the STUDENTS (KIDS) were GREAT!
But--However--On the OTHER hand--CONTRADICTORILY, MOST of the PARENTS were
the "ANTITHESIS of MODEL-/RESPONSIBLE-behavior"!

(… I'm "SLOWLY shaking my head in SADNESS & DISGUST".)

As the 'karateka' sat--QUIETLY/WELL-behaved & READY to spar, her MOM LOUDLY "barked" some Spanish "SWEAR-/CURSE-words" into her cell-phone.  (APPARENTLY, SOMEONE is a 'GILIPOLLAS' AND/OR 'una PINCHE IDIOTA'.)
PLUS, her "good-for-NOTHING" GRANDfather (I'm GUESSING, … 'cuz he was very-OLD!) just LET two even YOUNGER kids--of THEIRS--RUDELY run ONTO the dojo-floor & INTERRUPT class … TWICE!
ALL the while the STUDENT-daughter was seated-QUIETLY & INTENTLY-focused on CLASS.
(… AUDIBLE SSSIIIGGGHHH)


… Regarding the TOPIC-question, I think/KNOW 'tis a lil bit of BOTH, … which makes 'la pregunta' VERY-CIRCUMSTATIAL.

… The 'Karateka' is a STRONG-example AGAINST the pro-"Nurture" argument, 'cuz her GOOD-behavior "falls in SHARP-CONTRAST" to the REPREHENSIBLE-behavior exhibited by her SIBLINGS.  Also, her QUALITY-concentration shows that her parents' "PISS-POOR" parents' "CRAPPY child-RAISING/-REARING" did NOT necessarily "leave a PERMANENT-mark" on HER "way-of-LIFE".

… "Turning the attention toward ME",
I am the "PRODUCT" of a "high school"-VALEDICTORIAN (MOM) &  MATHEMATICAL-GENIUS (DAD).
My FOREIGN-father inspired my BROTHER & I to be very CULTURED & MULTI-lingual.
(… Speaking of the academic-curiosity of 'mi hermano', last night HE asked ME for HELP in his studies for a BIG preparatory MATH-test for HIS doctoral-studies … ABROAD.)
(… I'm NOT gonna LIE:
I was PLEASANTLY-surprised that he KNEW/REMEMBERED a "probability-theorem" involving "FACTORIALS"!)


P.S. "Bertrum" (I call my brother THAT to ANNOY him.  … Ha ha HA!)
He took OFFICIAL "PRE-Test" today & felt … "SOLID".



...

"If you want BIG-REWARDS, you've gotta take BIG-RISKS."

… (--'Summer Catch')


So, I "got-UP" (… into my WHEELCHAIR, NOT WOKE-UP) EARLY this morning, … 'cuz I just FELT like it. 
(Schedule-CHANGE, SPEECH, Martial arts, etc.)
ME: "WHAT?!  … Look.  ALL that matters is being (REMEMBERED.  WALKING-tall & SEMI-humbly bragging)!  And, right now, I'm lucky if (I can WALK--with ASSISTANCE--to my toilet to NOT "PISS-myself" in the middle of the night)!
ME: "WHAT?!  … Look.  ALL that matters is being (REMEMBERED.  WALKING-tall & SEMI-humbly bragging)!  And, right now, I'm lucky if (I can WALK--with ASSISTANCE--to my toilet to NOT "PISS-myself" in the middle of the night)!
HOWEVER, the PARENTS & OBSERVERS were VERY ANNOYING, EMBARRASSING & NOT-exemplary!

My VISITING brother: "NO!  You're WRONG!"

ME: "Bull-SHIT!  That's ALL that MATTERS!

Him: "No bullshit!  What matters is there's some of us who would say you've already made it! Some of us-- Some of us who've been there for you … (Who came to visit you when you were MISERABLE up at F.I.N.R. … And, who tries to get his friends to come hang out?!  Yeah, I MATTER.  You bet your ass what I think matters.  (YOUR commitment to academic-EXCELLENCE INSPIRED me to PURSUE my DOCTORATE … INTERNATIONALLY!)  And, I'm - I'm proud as hell you've done what you've done.  … It's - It's about having pride in what you do... Cuz - Cuz I do.  …"
(--'Summer Catch')

(To MYSELF:)

"LET yourself be GREAT."

So, there were ALOTTA GREAT "performances" by the KIDS at Karate-class tonight.




...

MY biographical-film: 'A Beautiful Mind'

… ("A THOUSAND APOLOGIES, my LIEGE!"--'Aladdin')
(… THOSE were--METAPHORICALLY--"MY words" to ONE-of my IDOLS/HEROES--John Nash--for claiming HIS "film" is/was--POTENTIALLY/POSSIBLY--about ME!)


Well, I slept VERY-WELL last night.
YAY!


TODAY, I got to THINKIN'.
(… As OPPOSED TO any/every OTHER day, … when I JUST "IDLY"/aimLESSly "TWIDDLE my THUMBS".)

(… I'm WAFTING the air.  SMELL that?!  I plug ONE nostril, & SNORT.  … It REEKS of SARCASM!)


ANYWAY,
my "Neural-PsychoTherapist" presented me with a HYPOTHETICAL-situation:
"IMAGINE if you suddenly learned that the PEOPLE, the PLACES, the MOMENTS MOST-IMPORTANT to you were not-GONE, not-DEAD, but WORSE, … had NEVER-BEEN.  … What kind of 'HELL' would THAT be?!"

… As I hypothesized this AWFUL-"PICKLE"/-CONUNDRUM, I fidgeted & AUDIBLY-grumbled.
CONCERNED, my PsychoTherapist asked me:
"So, how 'bout it, (A.J.)?  You SCARED?"
My reply: "Terrified … Mortified … Petrified … Stupefied … by YOU."


Honestly, I DID nudge my last girlfriend--as we watched this film.
"Perhaps it is good to have a beautiful-MIND, but 'tis an even-GREATER 'gift' to discover a beautiful-HEART."


MORE people--NAMELY MY "doctors"--NEED-to ADHERE to MY doctrine:
"I NEED-to BELIEVE … that something EXTRAORDINARY IS possible."

… Also, I--VIOLENTLY--"nudged my ELBOW" into my EX-g/f's side as John Nash made THIS claim: 
"I've made the most important discovery of my life: It's only in the mysterious equation of LOVE that any logic or reasons can be found. I'm only here tonight because of you. You are the only reason I am... you are all my reasons."

(… From THIS reasoning, 'tis APPARENT that the GREAT musician--& FELLOW Penn-grad--John Legend--SHARES this LOGIC … in HIS song 'All of Me'.)

I've--FINALLY--started-to "ACCEPT" the FACT that 
… LIFE is … essentially … "SURVIVAL of the FITTEST".
…
"In COMPETITIVE-behavior, someone ALWAYS 'loses'.
… Now, see, if I DERIVE an EQUILIBRIUM in which PREVALENCE is a NON-singular event where NOBODY 'loses', can you IMAGINE the EFFECT that would have on … CONFLICT-scenarios, ARM-negotiations.  … CURRENCY-exchange?"
(--Nash, 'A Beautiful Mind')

ME--to my CURRENT housemate:
"You have no respect for cognitive reverie, you know that?"

His reply: "Yes.  But, pizza - now, pizza I have enormous respect for. And, of course, BEER.

[leaves]

ME: "I have respect for beer. I have respect for BEER!"

ME: "Despite my (SEVERE 'Traumatic Brain-Injury'), I'm actually quite well-balanced. I have 'a chip on BOTH shoulders'."
(--the MATHEMATICALLY-LEGENDARY John Nash, 'A Beautiful Mind')

(… I HAVE-to a much LESSER-extent--'A Beautiful Mind'!)

(… Also, from my MANY observations, I've LONG-been VERY-disappointed with society's--COLLECTIVE--STUPIDITY & IGNORANCE!)

(… No, I am NOT being STILTED or CONDESCENDING. I am MERELY stating a SCIENTIFIC-conclusion.)

My--VALIANT--"ATTEMPT-to" EXPLAIN MY "MATHEMATICAL-intuition"/-gut":

ME: "You ever... just KNOW something?"
… (EERIE-SILENCE)

ME--about MYSELF: "CONSTANTLY!"

My mom--to my Neural-PsychoTherapist: "(Doc), (A.J.)'s always been a little… 'WEIRD'."

ME: "THANKS, Doc, … for 'seeing the INNER-/TRUE-ME'."
…

"NO act of KINDNESS--no matter HOW SMALL--is EVER 'wasted'."

(--Aesop)

FINALLY,

ME: "There's no point in being nuts if you can't have a little fun."

((Being the OPTIMIST--full of HOPE--that I AM, I "envision" EACH & EVERY day … as a "PRACTICE" … that leads-UP to my ULTIMATE "WALKING-/TALKING-'VICTORY'":

"I think every single (day), including today, you’re going to have some ups, you’re going to have some downs. It’s all about how you bounce back from the downs. As long as you learn from those mistakes and they don’t happen again, I consider it a good day." 
(--Denver Broncos BACKUP QB Brock Osweiler))


...

"'TRUE-FOCUS' lies between RAGE and SERENITY."

…

(--Charles Xavier, 'X-Men: First Class')

-- When you're good at anticipating the human mind, you leave nothing to chance.
(--Jigsaw, 'Saw')

… I CONSTANTLY TRY-to "PREDICT" my Caregivers' moves/tactics WILL-be, … 'cuz … I kinda HAFTA, given how LONG MANY DAILY-activities take ME … in my CURRENT-condition.
But, ALAS!  SOME MINOR-stupidity & -ignorance CAN-be QUITE PROBLEMATIC to UNDERSTAND & PREDICT … ESPECIALLY for ME!
(… "Ignorance brings CHAOS … NOT knowledge."(--Lucy, 'Lucy')

-- I watched "SNIPPETS" of the GREAT-movie--'Lucy'---of which I had PREVIOUSLY seen ALL.
THEN, I HAD-to "take a BREAK" to converse with my accountantS.
(… "GOOD talk!  Good talk."--ME)
… ONE of my accountants actually BRILLIANTLY thought-to … & "FOLLOWED-THRU" … CONTACT my "SEMI-""Master's School" (Nova Southeastern University) to REQUEST-for my TRANSCRIPT.
(… "Nova Southeastern" is WHERE I attend my "LECTURES".)

… SPEAKING of which, I attended a "Lecture" this morning.  The TOPIC was "Habits".  When I ORIGINALLY signed-UP for the "class", I THOUGHT it'd be related-to TENDENCIES

I COUNTED 41 of the 46 people (~89.13%) in-ATTENDANCE were REALLY-OLD!
Now, I am NOT one to "JUDGE-people … based SOLELY on APPEARANCE", (… I have OPENLY declared my LIVID-OPPOSITION to such IGNORANT-ASSUMPTIONS!)
But, when the (OLD) Speaker actually SAID, "Since we're ALL RETIRED, …", I looked at my Caregiver, "ROLLED my EYES", SIGHED & "shot a BEE-line" STRAIGHT for the "EXIT-door".
(… 'Twas after ONLY ~18 minutes.)

-- Even though I am "VERY COMFORTABLE"--FINANCIALLY, I do NOT "let IT go-to my head".
UN-fortunately, TOO-MANY people in "TODAY'S Society" "value the WRONG-things"!
"We humans are more-concerned with 'HAVING' than 'BEING'."
(--Professor Norman, 'Lucy')

--

(I'm--AGAIN--talking to MYSELF:) "RELAX, DOPE! I FOUND it!"

…
I WAS … PERTURBED/IRKED/PEEVED/DISTRAUGHT that my UN-reliable/"SPOTTY"/DISAPPOINTING memory AGAIN "let ME down"/"DISAPPOINTED me"!

But, FORTUNATELY, MY RESOLVE/DETERMINATION/"PUSH" "kicked-IN", & I FOUND it!

(… My "THEME-song writing" was merely "posted" under an ALTERNATIVE-"subject"/-"title".
(… A.J., YOU are a "NINCOMPOOP" "to the Nth-degree"!)


(MORE later … TODAY/TONIGHT)


...

… "SHIT-BALLZ!" I had a MAJOR-Malfunction!

… I woke-UP this morning to find
that my LONG-recap of YESTERDAY's activities is …

GONE!

NOTHING left!

"W.T.F.?!"

… In HINDSIGHT, I went--& HAFTA go--"BALLZ 2 the WALL"!

…
I returned home, IN BED, FROM my "UFC-party" at 2:36 am.
(… We martial artists "KNOW how to 'par-TAY' … DEEP/LONG into the night"!)

… HOWEVER, the "MAIN-card"/"TOP-fight"--Cousey v. Corrreia--lasted JUST 34 seconds!
(… I JOKED that "I went to PEE.  But, when I RETURNED, … I'd MISSED the fight!")

… Nonetheless, I am STILL VERY-GLAD I went-OUT for the GREAT event!

1) Rousey--an AMERICAN--REQUESTED the fight be IN BRAZIL (& it WAS), so she could "BEAT her (her OPPONENT--who's BRAZILIAN--Bethe Correia)'s ASS, in front of HER HOME-crowd"!

2) I had the PRIVILEGE of MINGLING with the youngER folks THEN "CONVERSING" with the wiseR-folks!
(… "With AGE comes WISDOM.")

3)  THOSE--FOUR--"martial arts"-LEADERS "act" as my "SECOND-family".

4) The MAIN-guy--myCHIEF-INSTRUCTOR--enlightened us by informing us that WE--FOUR--"ARE the CORE of American 'Budokai' ('Warriot's Way') at THE PRIME-'Shuri'-DOJO in America".

5) … To THIS COMPLIMENT, I remarked:
"WOW!  I am HONORED that YOU (I pointed AT my/THE CHIEF-Instructor.) consider ME--in my CURRENT-condition--PART of your/THE Leadership-'CORE'."

6) … FINALLY, Rousey's EASY-WIN was a "VICTORY" for AMERICA, DECENCY, MANNERS & "COMMON SENSE"!
((… Correia--that "NO-talent ASS-clown"(--Michael Bolton, 'Office Space') went WAY "OVER the LINE" by TEASING Rousey about her father--who, TRAGICALLY, commit suicide.  Then, she DENIED ever doing so!  … I SAW the video-conference, in which Correia VEHEMENTLY, STUPIDLY remarked to Rousey:
"After I BEAT you, doN'T go CRYIN' & KILL-YOURSELF--like your DAD!"
… IN-sensitive 'PERRA'!  I--'Ah HOHTA'--WANNA "KICK the LIVIN' CRAP outta" her!))
(… Yes, y'ALL Spanish-speakers, I AM aware that I--DELIBERATELY--referred to Correia as a 'FEMALE-dog' or 'BITCH'.  But, does she NOT DESERVE such a LABRL/TITLE?!)

…
HHHMMM.
"The ONLY way ro 'GET RID OF' TEMPTATION is to 'YIELD-TO' it!"
(--'Blunt Talk')
(… THAT SEEMS very "DEFEAT-ist"--VERY "A-pathetic".  … But, … COULD it be a CIRCUMSTANTIAL "MEANS-to-an-END"?!)



...

"If you're gonna 'GO', … go ALL-OUT!"

… 
"I began to realize how important it was to be an enthusiast in 

life. If you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go 

at it full speed. Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and 

above all become passionate about it. Lukewarm is no good." 

--Ronald Dahl


… 'Tis "ALL or NOTHIN'."




"Harnessing one's 'QI'":

Happiness: it's not about getting what we don't have, instead 

it's about appreciating and recognizing what we do have.


… I HAFTA remember to NOT--IN-directly--refer to "A.J. 

Kaynatma as "ONE-self"!  Or, I'll get my "ASS-kicked" … by 

SOMEONE!

(… God ALREADY-had HIS turn!)



… ALAS!  After a GREAT KIDS' Karate-class … I'm gettin' 

ready to go to my "martial arts"-Professor's house to watch

the BIG "Ultimate Fighting Championships"-fights ("UFC"-

fights) at ~8 pm.   

(… UFC 190)


Despite being by-MYSELF for MUCH of the day, I kept 

myself … BUSY … by watching BASEBALL, FUNNY-

MOVIES ('Just Go with It'), COOKING-shows ('Chopped'), 

clever 'Karateka' (KIDS) & creating MORE Karate-/Jujitsu-

techniques.



((MORE 'yarin'/'man(tilde)ana'/'TOMORROW')





...