"That's all Life really is:"

… "A series of 'MOMENTS'."



((…
(SARCASTICALLY)  "JEEZ!  If there wasn't a movie made about it, it's NOT worth knowing."
(BOTH quotes --'Dogma'))


...

"Where did you get a HAND-GRENADE?"

…
(--Ron Burgundy, 'Anchorman')


D'you hear that

(Mr. Burgundy just exclaimed:
"Tuesdays are 'ARMS & BACK'."

EVERY Tuesday I have a workout with my "UPPER body"-trainer.

Am I "workin' HARD or HARDLY workin''"?
APPARENTLY, my INCREASED range-of-motion, flexibility and muscle-control  indicate that I'm IMPROVING!


...

… CORRECTION/REVISION:

… I MAY have typed the WRONG date of my "Traumatic"-accident.
I was misinformed.

It was July 6, 2008.


(07/06/08)

(… NUMBERS)


...

"Remember:"

… "'HOPE' is a GOOD thing--maybe the BEST of things."
(--'The Shawshank Redemption')

Although SOMETIMES I may STRUGGLE, it's IMPORTANT to think "BIG-PICTURE":

I've accomplished SO MUCH with my POSITIVE, OPTIMISTIC frame-of-mind.
So, KEEP GOIN'!


(My new theme-song:

"DON'T stop …
BELIEEEVIN'!
Hold on to that FEE-HEE-LIN'!
…")


...

(SIGH) I do NEITHER.

… I noticed--during my DAILY morning-WALK from my bed to my bathroom-sink (~75 feet = ~25 yards) that I do NOT follow the instructional-saying:


"Walk SOFTLY, and CARRY a big stick."


1) I step HEAVILY--subconsciously, because I'm just eager to be STABLE.
(I feel "STABILITY"/BALANCE, when I'm SEATED in my chair OR when I'm standing with my have my feet spread shoulder-length apart.
(I'm "ANCHORED".)

2) IF I CARRIED a LARGE (probably wooden) "batting-device", I would--LIKELY--NOT have the balance to PROPERLY, SUCCESSFULLY "WALK".


(… HOWEVER, I AM IMPROVING.)


(DETAILS LATER)
...

NOT "politically correct" … but FUNNY:

… My emotions would/could BEST be summed up by

Kim Fong-Il in the HILARIOUS film, 'Team America: World Police':


"I'm So Ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone 

There's no one
Just me onry
Sitting on my rittle throne 
I work rearry hard and make up great prans
But nobody ristens, no one understands
Seems like no one takes me serirousry 

And so I'm ronery
A rittle ronery
Poor rittle me 

There's nobody
I can rerate to
Feel rike a bird in a cage 
It's kinda sihry
But not rearry
Because it's fihring my body with rage 

I'm the smartest most crever most physicarry fit
But nobody else seems to rearize it
When I change the world maybe they'll notice me 
But until then I'rr just be ronery
Rittle ronery, poor rittle me

I'm so ronery."


(… Ergo, I ALWAYS appreciate guests …. to "shoot the (proverbial) SHIT".


... 

It's "Just another MANIC MONday."

… "Wish it were SUNday.
'Cuz that's my FUN-day."



…

… GREAT ADVICE!

…
One of my recent visitors--"The Creator" (of my blog)--AGAIN reminded me of my POOR neck-posture (subconsciously tilting my head to the right).
So, I DECIDED to email MYSELF a reminder.
Email-topic/subject:

"SUBCONSCIOUS habits"

It's been VERY HELPFUL!



...

Why EVERYTHING takes ME a TAD LONGER:

…

"I'm suckling from 'the feet' of modern physics."

(--'The Big Bang Theory')

… That comment is not only HILARIOUS, but it's also SOMEWHAT TRUE (METAPHORICALLY).

Before EACH and EVERY one of my activities/"significant movements", I HAVE TO visualize/"plan out" exactly WHAT I'll do and HOW I'll do it.

...

... MORE "angles":

... They're EVERYWHERE!

So, earlier today I DISPLAYED my 30 (+2) squats to my two buddies.
I noticed that for MOST of my squats, I bend my legs at (APPROXIMATELY) a 150 degree angle.
(THIS is by using my "standing STRAIGHT-BACKED at my hand-rail in my shower as my 0 degree plane.)


HOWEVER, I probably only focused on "putting MOST of my weight" on my LEFT--WEAKER--leg on ~20 of my squats.


…

I'm a "PEOPLE-person".

…
Today two of my GOOD friends visited me.
As a result, I was INSPIRED--NOT to "show off" but to display my PROGRESS!

1) I did some "WALKING"--with my walker.

2) I did PLENTY of "TALKING" (VERBALLY).

3) … I explained some football-jargon.  ("three & out", "give him CUSHION")


...

QUESTION: Would you RATHER be "Gumby" or "Stretch Armstrong"?

...
My answer: "Neither.  I'd be 'Inspector Gadget'."


LATE last night I awoke from my slumber, 'cuz I had an ANNOYING itch on my LEFT lower calf.


(Also, my LEFT mid-level back ITCHED.)

Alas, I've gotta THANK my 21+ years of "martial arts"-training (karate AND 'jiujitsu') AND my eight years of wrestling for giving me the FLEXIBILITY to "REACH ease and tranquility" (Pun intended.)

Also, it doesn't "HURT" that I have an amazing "grasp" of TRIGONOMETRY (the study of ANGLES) and PHYSICS (the study of the laws/principles of MOVEMENT).


...

Was Latin POPULAR even in 1899-NYC?!

…
I JUST watched the film, 'Newsies'.
In the movie, the newsboys sing:

"Let us SEIZE the DAY!"

(… Latin translation:
'Carpe diem.')

(… I THINK that's the CORRECT "English-Latin" conversion.
I took four years of SPANISH in high school!)

(… HOWEVER, my college-degree in "BioMEDICAL Engineering and my "SICKENING"/"CRAZY" obsession with MATHEMATICS has given me a thorough ("LAYMAN"'s) understanding of the CLASSIC language!)


...

I'm NOT a "HATER".

…
"WHY would you WANT to go to a school that's OLDER than the United States?!"
(Yale)
--'Sportscenter


(… I attended the University of Pennsylvania.)

QUESTION:

…
Is it BETTER to be more

"ACCURATE"

or more

"PRECISE"

?

BOTH descriptive-adjectives require MULTIPLE trials.
"ACCURACY" indicates that attempts are close to the DESIRED/"CORRECT" result.
"PRECISION" indicates that attempts are close to EACH OTHER.
(Sooo, if my trials are "PRECISE", then they're "CONSISTENT".)



Well, this 'pregunta' (Spanish for 'question') is VERY CIRCUMSTANTIAL.
(… OF COURSE, I ask a MATH-related question.)
(… That's just HOW MY MIND "operates".)


In my CURRENT state, I'd RATHER be more "PRECISE".
Since I always use LOGIC, then I feel that I'm PREDOMINANTLY (WITHOUT seeming ARROGANT) QUITE EFFICIENT in terms of conserving my ENERGY.

(… PART of my thinking/REASONING is that by thinking my "problems" through and ANALYZING the BEST procedure, I can LIMIT my number of "DO-OVERS".)

(… HOWEVER, my way of energy-conserving, LOGICAL thinking MAY have PARTIALLY contributed to my LACK OF endurance.)


...

These (BACKWARDS) instructions--STRANGELY--apply to ME.

…

((Since I USED TO (or "STILL DO") (??) have metal IN/ON my LEFT KNEE, it can be PAINFUL sometimes to "CRAWL", since I'd be supporting my ENTIRE body-weight--~143.00 pounds (~65.00 kilograms)--DIRECTLY with/ON my kneecaps, PAIN seems VERY LIKELY/PROBABLE to ensue.))


"I know that I will never be politically correct
And I don't give a damn about my lack of etiquette
As far as I'm concerned, the world could still be flat
And if the thrill is gone, then it's time to take it back
If the thrill is gone, then it's time to take it back

Who am I? Why am I here?
Forget the questions, someone gimme another beer
What's the meaning of life, what's the meaning of it all?
You gotta learn to dance before you learn to crawl
You gotta learn to dance before you learn to crawl

So sign up all you raw recruits,
Throw away those designer suits
You got your weapons cocked,
Your targets in your sights
There's a party raging somewhere in the world
You gotta serve your country,
Gotta service your girl
You're all enlisted in the armies of the night

And I ain't in it for the power,
And I ain't in it for my health
I ain't in it for the glory of anything at all
And I sure ain't in it for the wealth
But I'm in it till it's over and I just can't stop
If you wanna get it done,
You gotta do it yourself
And I like my music like I like my life
Everything louder than everything else,
Everything louder than everything else,
Everything louder than everything else,
Everything louder than everything else,
Everything louder than everything else,
Everything louder than everything else,

Wasted youth! Wasted youth!
Wasted youth! Wasted youth!

They got a file on me and it's a mile long
And they say that they got all of the proof
That I'm just another case of arrested development
And just another wasted youth

They say that I'm in need of some radical discipline
They say I gotta face the truth
That I'm just another case of arrested development
And just another wasted youth

They say I'm wild and I'm reckless,
(wild, wild, wild)
I should be acting my age
I'm an impressionable child in a tumultuous world
And they say I'm at a difficult stage

But it seems to me to the contrary
Of all the crap they're going to put on the page
That a wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age
A wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age
A wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age
A wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age
A wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age
A wasted youth is better by far
Than a wise and productive old age

If you want my views of history
Then there's something you should know
The three men I admire most
Are Curly, Larry and Mo!
If you don't worry 'bout the future,
Sooner or later it's the past
And if they say the thrill is gone,
Then it's time to take it back
If the thrill is gone,
Then it's time to take it back

So sign up all you raw recruits,
Throw away all those two-bit suits
You got your weapons cocked,
Your targets in your sights
There's a party raging somewhere in the world
You gotta serve your country,
Gotta service your girl
You're all inducted in the armies of the night

And I ain't in it for the power,
And I ain't in it for my health
I ain't in it for the glory of anything at all
And I sure ain't in it for the wealth
But I'm in it till it's over and I just can't stop
If you wanna get it done,
You gotta fight for yourself
And I like my music like I like my life

Everything louder than everything else
Everything louder than everything else
Everything louder than everything else"



--Meat Loaf


(I JUST watched the HILARIOUS movie, ''That's My Boy'', and THIS song is in the background toward the end.)



...

"'SCIENCE' is NOT about HUMAN RELATIONS."

… "It's about RESULTS."
(--'House')
(… Two doctors were arguing about the TACTICS/METHODS/PROCEDURE of a "DOUBLE-BLIND"-study.)


As a "MEDICAL/THEORETICAL-anomaly", I can only WISH that my INITIAL POST-accident doctors WOULD'VE taken this conclusion MORE into account.


NEVER did I display ANY indications of "SEVERE MENTAL-DEFICIENCIES".
(… Yes, I have MEMORY-problems.  But, I would NOT be surprised, if THOSE SAME DOCTORS regarded/classified EVERYONE OVER ~80  YEARS of age as "RETARDED".
(… THAT's what they called ME!)




...

"So, you're tellin' me there's a CHANCE!"

… --'Dumb & Dumber'


…
"EVERYONE possesses the 'strength' to change (his/her) OWN FATE."
(--'Mortal Kombat: Annihilation')


Even though I STRUGGLE to WALK--CURRENTLY, I've working to IMPROVE/INCREASE my PATIENCE.
Alas, I MUST ALWAYS remember:


"GOOD things come to those (ME) who WAIT."


...

I SHAN'T LIE!

…

I'm not ALWAYS in a GREAT mood.

Granted I AM--for the MOST PART--a JOVIAL, OPTIMISTIC … (I'm locating my EXTERNAL genitalia.  Ah, yes.  There's the CONFIRMATION!) … MAN. 

I just tend to get VERY FRUSTRATED, 'cuz MANY of my "staff"--even, sometimes a FAMILY-member--will MISTAKE my frustration for ANGER.

(… This MIS-understanding may LIKELY be due to my TENDENCY to EXHALE DEEPLY with AUDIBLE "HUFFING and PUFFING".)

(… I've GOTTA better CONTROL that!)

UH-OH!  I may or may NOT be drifting toward "The DARK Side" in 'StarWars'.

"The Emperor" keeps "HISSING" at me:

"GIVE IN to your ANGER!"

I'm TRYING TO RESIST!

ALAS, Master Yoda says:

"DO or do NOT.  There is no 'TRY'."

...

"Why change a GOOD thing?!"

…
"If it AIN'T BROKE, DON'T fix it."


Even BEFORE my HORRIFIC, "TRAUMATIC" car-accident, NUMBERS "governed" (METAPHORICALLY) my life.

NOW, it's APPROXIMATELY 6.48 FULL YEARS LATER.  When I maneuver in/about my rather ROOMY abode, I STILL regulate myself.

My MOTORIZED-wheelchair has a SPEED-regulator.
When I'm turning or backing-up, I generally travel at "Speed-ONE".
(The "SPEEDS" range from "ONE" to "FIVE".)
When I'm in a room, I go "Speed TWO".
When I'm moving through my "CAVERNOUS" family room, I USUALLY "move through" at "SPEED THREE".
HOWEVER, if I am feeling particularly "BADASS", I MAY "CRANK UP" the/my "SPEED" to "FOUR" … or even "FIVE".


IF I were to CRASH into something, let's HOPE I can--YET AGAIN--talk my way out of a ticket from authorities.
(Cross your fingers.)


(… Oh, wait.  I'M the "AUTHORITY" in MY HOUSE!)
(… WHEW!)



...

"I don't KNOW the future."

…
"I'm NOT here to tell you how your life will END.
I am here to tell you how it will BEGIN."
(--Neo--The ONE, 'The Matrix')



… ACTUALLY, I am DETERMINED to make "MY WALKING"--PART--of my future.

Ergo, if/should--WHEN--I WALK, I would accept the alias of

"Punxsutawney Phil--the SEE-er of see-ers, the PROGNOSTICATOR of prognosticators".
(--'Groundhog Day')



P.S. Do I relate my ISSUES/PROBLEMS/SITUATION/LIFE TOO MUCH with/to movies?


...

(I'm tapping my foot.) ANY TIME NOW.

…

"Well, as Nietzsche said,
'From DIS-order comes order.'"
(--'Blazing Saddles')


Well, I've had PLENTY of DIS-array over the last ~6.416… years.
So, I am IM-patiently waiting for "OGIC"/"DEGREE"/"REGULARITY" (… Ha ha HA!  THAT was a Poop-Pun!) (… "Alliteration aside."--'Dodgeball') to "settle in".



...

"Do you believe in 'FATE'?

…
"No.
… 'Cuz I don't like the idea that I'm NOT in control of MY OWN life."
(--'The Matrix--which I'm watching right … NOW.)


… SO OFTEN in the last SIX+ YEARS, I've felt as if OTHER PEOPLE were making decisions regarding MY LIFE.  Only AFTER said choices were decided, was I informed.

Now, that's some hardcore-B.S.!


…
"What IS 'REAL'?
How do we define 'REAL'?"
(Morpheus, 'The Matrix')


I'm GETTIN' THERE.
("GOOD work takes TIME.")



...

INSPIRATION!

…
I JUST watched ''A Knight's Tale''.

The film "voices" my LIFE-motto:

"I WILL 'change the stars'" … in regards to my MOBILITY/WALKING.

"Do NOT judge, lest YE be judged."

… Now, I am NOT a theologic man,
DESPITE my graduating 'summa cum laude' ('with HIGHEST honor'--for those who do NOT  understand Latin) (… SSSHHH!  I took FOUR YEARS of Spanish.  I just know A LOT … of RANDOM "CRAP"!) from a PRESTIGIOUS Catholic high school.
(… TRANSLATION: I was VALEDICTORIAN.)

… So, that whole Latin "TANGENT" (I HAD TO sneak in a MATHEMATICAL term!) was just a way to STALL, while I researched that quote.


AH, yes.  HERE it is!

It's in Matthew 7:1 of the Holy Bible.
(… "'HOLEY Bartender', I get it.  That's GENIUS!"--Jay, 'Dogma')


… So, I ABHOR when people

-- see my wheelchair
-- see my NOT speaking and INSTEAD pointing to letters on my "letter-board"
-- hear "T.B.I." (Traumatic Brain-Injury") and shutter/CRINGE

and just "ASS-ume" that I'm "RETARDED"!
(I APOLOGIZE for the "politically IN-correct" term, but I'm JUST QUOTING some of the IGNORANCE I've actually HEARD … about ME!)


… I have some "CHOICE-WORDS" for/about you DOLTS, but I'm gonna "hold my tongue".




CONCLUSION:
I'm an ANOMALY!
I KNOW I'm SMARTER than MOST people.
"I just 'SEE IT'."
(--'Good Will Hunting')

(… That MAY SEEM condescending!  But, I'm just "VENTING".)


...

"You see 'US' as you want to see 'US':"

…
"a BRAIN,
an ATHLETE,
a PRINCESS,
a BASKET-CASE,
and a CRIMINAL."
(--'The Breakfast Club')


UNFORTUNATELY/FORTUNATELY, EACH of THESE TERMS would apply to ME.


("BRAIN" = I was valedictorian.
"ATHLETE" = I have trained in martial arts for 21+ years.
"PRINCESS" = I like to be PRETTY.
"BASKET-CASE" = I have a "Traumatic Brain-Injury".
"CRIMINAL" = I talked my way out of a ticket for CAUSING a fender-bender.)





P.S. I "WRESTLED" for EIGHT YEARS, and one of the students in detention in the film (Emilio Estevez was a "WRESTLER".

P.P.S. …
"The EDITORIAL ('us').  The EDITORIAL …"
(--'The Big Lebowski')


...

DAMN my "FAULTY" memory!

…
I get very frustrated when I have a GREAT WORKOUT--at my gym ("NeuroFit 360")--but FORGET the details of my exercise-routine to describe it to y'all!


(… NOT today!)

I worked on my BALANCE, COORDINATION and TRUNK-CONTROL by sitting on a LARGE rubber ball in front of a mirror, while my trainers did assorted things to OFF-BALANCE me.

(… SUCCESS!)



...

"START strong. FINISH strong."

…
THIS is my motto during EACH of my FOUR WEEKLY workouts.

(.. My "exercise-slogan" MAY/PROBABLY caused my NOTICEABLE IMPROVEMENT in my ENDURANCE.)

((… ALSO, my LONGTIME involvement with my Karate-dojo (… Heck, ALL my athletic-participation contributed.)

We ("The ROYAL 'we'--the EDITORIAL …"--'The Big Lebowski') MUST KNOW how to PROPERLY, EFFICIENTLY breathe!

(… AGAIN, THANK YOU, martial arts!)


...

Mt "Traumatic Brain-Injury" has SIGNIFICANTLY decreased/DIMINISHED my PATIENCE.

…
(  : (  )

You would THINK that I'd get VERY FRUSTRATED … with MYSELF, 'cuz I have 0 out of 2 "GOOD" legs and ~1.6 "GOOD" hands.
(My RIGHT pinkie and ring finger are VIRTUALLY useless thanks to a PRE-accident "BOTCHED" surgery.)

But, I've come to tolerate, understand and ACCEPT my SLOWED timing.
I EVEN "factor in" (I've GOTTA have some mathematical "JARGON" in MY post!) EXTRA time, when I'm PLANNING my DAILY schedule of ACTIVITIES.
(I add 10 to 15 minutes to EVERYTHING.)
(… That'd be
600 to 900 seconds OR
1/6 to 1/4 of an hour OR
~0.1667 to 0.25 of an hour.)

… My LACK OF patience applies more with--UNFORTUNATELY--my peers.
I've learned to "HARNESS/LIMIT my FRUSTRATION" with "new"/UN-knowing people.  (YAY!) But, when it comes to FAMILIAR people--who SHOULD KNOW of "my SITUATION"/DISABILITIES, then I get REALLY UPSET/ANGRY.
(I WANNA--SARCASTICALLY--SCREAM:
"Uuummm, did you FORGET that I'm in a wheelchair AND struggle to speak COGENTLY, Captain OBVIOUS?!"


...

… (SIGH) 5:34 am EST

… /
It's entirely TOO early!

That (STPID, ANNOYING, AGGRAVATING) dog is REALLY (NEGATIVELY) affecting MY "rehabilitation"!
THUS--THEREFOR--HENCE--ERGO--CONSEQUENTLY, that DAMN dog is DETRIMENTAL to MY HEALTH!

I wonder WHY I'm CONSTANTLY so TIRED.
HHHMMM …

(THAT was "DRIPPING with SARCASM"!)


...

"WARRIOR-Spirit"

… --one of MY shirts from my Karate-dojo

…
"WHAT we do in life echoes in eternity."
(--'Gladiator')

(… "The ROYAL 'we'--the EDITORIAL."
--'The Big Lebowski')


Now, I'm NOT TECHNICALLY a "GLADIATOR".
However, I feel that as I continue my LONG, PERILOUS, ARDUOUS journey toward a COMPLETE "recovery", I'm feeling MORE and MORE like a METAPHORICAL "GLADIATOR"/"WARRIOR".


...

… "AAAHHH, the timing!" Part II

…
My FAITH/BELIEF/RESPECT for "ye WHITE-COATED medical-'professionals'" is SLOWLY being RE-stored.

Yesterday I saw my "primary-care physician" for a "checkup".
He noted … to me:
"WOW!  What a GREAT improvement you've made in six months!"


(Not to BRAG, but I

-- lifted up AND took down the footrests on my wheelchair, using ONLY the "CALCULATED maneuverability" of my FEET.  (I WANTED TO yell:
"Look, Ma.  NO HANDS!"
(--Sir Elton John)

-- CONSTANTLY adjusted my head-/neck-placement to NOT lean/tilt to my right.
(… I've become SLIGHTLY more SELF-aware.  Although I still can NOT feel it, I just KNOW when I'm NOT straight.)
(… "No homo.")

-- leaned forward and down--in my wheelchair--to demonstrate my "trunk-control".



MY Conclusion

… AGAIN, "It's ALL angles."


...

"AAAHHH, the timing!"

… (an inside-joke between my ex-girlfriend and me)

… For the THIRD CONSECUTIVE DAY/MORNING, my mom's (EXASPERATING) dog has awoken me … ALWAYS at 6:08 am.
I NEED my "BEAUTY-sleep"!
I WANNA--LOUDLY--inquire:
"WHO DISTURBS MY SLUMBER?!(--'Aladdin')

(… But, I already KNOW the answer to THAT.
The CONSTANT, LOUD, NON-threatening, just ANNOYING barking is KIND OF a "DEAD-GIVEAWAY".)

MY CONCLUSION:
The EARLY wake-ups contribute to the reason WHY I feel SO FATIGUED by ~5:00 pm.
(… ALSO, the fact that I'm CONSTANTLY SITTING--in my wheelchair--FURTHER "adds in" to my "lethargy".)


This LACK OF effort and energy is in STARK CONTRAST to my TRUE-SELF … PRE-accident.

I WAS … "the LIFE OF THE PARTY"!

(… Even in my wrestling-matches in high school and college, I didn't ALWAYS WIN.
But, I PRIDED MYSELF on NOT getting tired, "rolling over" and "getting 'STUCK'/'PINNED'".)


...

Even when I'm NOT teaching class, I still LEARN IMPORTANT stuff (at Karate class)!

… Tonight, my Karate-professor lectured:

"You EXHALE when your muscles CONTRACT.
The contraction works STRONGER, QUICKER, BETTER, when you make an AUDIBLE sound."

(… That's GOOD to know, "Prof"!)


...

… Graphing my STEADY (PHYSICAL) IMPROVEMENT (at "NeuroFit 360"):

…

I thought it was IMPORTANT to put my PHYSICAL-PROGRESS in a "form"/"lexicon" I BETTER understand (MATHEMATICAL-GRAPHING):


Since I can NOT draw an ELECTRONIC/COMPUTER-GRAPHIC picture (… Watch, "the Creator"--of my blog--will explain how I COULD.), just VISUALIZE the graph.


ENDURANCE
(minutes on "I-Care" before a break)

(On WEEKLY intervals:)
3, 4, 7. 8, 10, 11, 12, 15, 17
(slope = rise/run)
(slope = m = 17 - 3 = 14 / 9 trials/dates)

(m = 14/9)



SPEED
(revolutions of leg-device per minute)

(On a WEEKLY basis:)
10, 12, 15, 17, 20, 22, 24, 26, 27
(slope = m = 27 - 10 = 17 / 9 recordings

(m = 17/9)



… Ergo, my ENDURANCE is IMPROVING at a rate of just OVER 1.5 TIMES per week.
(m =~1.56)
My SPEED is IMPROVING at a rate of ALMOST TWO TIMES per week.  (m = ~1.89)

(… Yeah, I "ACED" A.P. Statistics in 12th grade … as an ELECTIVE.)


("I just 'SEE' it."--'Good Will Hunting')


(… NERD!)


...

"Give it your BEST shot."

…
Despite my CONSTANT "obstacles", I ALWAYS "give it my ALL"--NO MATTER the task/"obstacle".

(I think that THAT "type of thinking"/outlook is ESSENTIAL regardless of the "conditions".)

(… "The glass is half-FULL.")


...

((WARNING) No more "HIDING behind your PRECIOUS '"white coat".

… Yesterday I "evacuated my bowels"

THREE SEPARATE TIMES.

(I've never done that.)
(… My GI-doctor said that if I do NOT "go" ("#2) "EVERY DAY", then I'm "probably sick".


Well,

1) I COMPLETELY DIS-agree with your HALF-ASS medical-"OPINION"!

2) I PRIDE MYSELF on NOT being "REGULAR".
(Poop-pun)
(JEEZ, I'm funny!)
So, thanks for introducing me to THAT!
(… That was SARCASTIC.)
(In mathematics "THREE negatives STILL equal a negative".
So, even in MY lexicon, I FAIL to see his LOGIC.)

3)  … "The GOD-DAMN PLANE has CRASHED into the MOUNTAIN!"
(--"The OTHER Jeffrey Lebowski.  The million-AIRE.". 'The Big Lebowski')

4) In the words of President Warren Harding, this was HARDLY "a return to NORMALCY".



(The above facts have to do with MY HEALTH.
Ergo, they are RELEVANT.--hence the "WARNING".)



...

"Can YOU understand the words that are comn' outta my MOUF?!"

… --'Rush Hour'

Recently, I used the BRILLIANT advice of my Speech Therapist to VERBALLY tell my "Neural-psychologist" that

"I'm spea-king more EH-LOH-quent-lee (eloquently)."

Her advice/tips:
-- Take a DEEP breath.
-- Separate words into SYL-LAH-BUHLS (syllables).
-- ENUNCIATE.


...

… He's TALKIN' to ME!

…
"Morpheus" is saying TO ME:

"I can only SHOW you 'the door'.
You have to 'WALK THROUGH IT'."
(--'The Matrix')


(… I'm interpreting that quote as both LITERAL and METAPHORICAL.

(…
I am "The ONE".)



...

"Easier SAID than DONE."

…
I've GOTTA "FREE my mind!"
(--'The Matrix')


(… "Traumatically Injured" as it is, I feel like I'm a TRAPPED ANIMAL--'cuz I struggle to CONSISTENTLY COGENTLY/CLEARLY speak.
But, I'm making GREAT PROGRESS in my Speech Therapy!

Oh, I shall SYMPHONICALLY call out:
"Ah!  How the caged bird SINGS!"

(… ALL in due time)


...

"Since (I) like SCIENCE,"

….
"Maybe (I) could develop a cure for being a DORK."
('The Big Bang Theory')


Ah, yes--'Dorkis Maximus'.
It's a very COMMON "infection".
(I--myself--have been "SUFFERING" from the "AFFLICTION" since grade-school.

…
My rih-search seems to be to NO AVAIL.
:(


...

THANX, "NeuroFit 360" (my gym)!

…
During the course of the past few weeks, I've

-- SIGNIFICANTLY IMPROVED my trunk-ROTATION and -CONTROL

-- IMPROVED my NECK- and BACK-POSTURE

-- developed a STEADY, STABLE and COMFORTABLE STRIDE/GAIT.


…

"You're so WISE. You're like a miniature Buddha covered with hair,"

…
(--'Anchorman')


…
"Drop all your PRE-conceived and fixed ideas."
(--Bruce Lee)


I only wish that MOST people be SO ignorant/UN-knowing!

EVERY TIME I notice that people start speaking to me very SLOWLY and LOUDLY, I wanna quote  Andy Dufresne from 'The Shawshank Redemption':

"How can you be so OBTUSE?!
Is it deliberate?"


...

ALWAYS sitting (in my wheelchair) promotes LETHARGY.

…
However,
"I'm TIRED.  I'm NOT DEAD!"
(--'Stigmata')



This is YET ANOTHER example of how SOME movies can/will "just tell it like it is" … and NOT lie.
(This "code of conduct" remains in STARK CONTRAST to the acts/beliefs of my previous DOCTORS.


...

SSSHHH! I could be Kurt Russell.

… Mr. Russell starred in the 2004-film,

'MIRACLE'.

...

"I CAN'T be hiding under the bed."

… "Only a WIMP would do that."
(--'Home Alone')

1) I am NOT a "wimp".
((Actually, I have BIG (METAPHORICAL) "BALLZ"--meaning: I'm VERY "BRAVE".))

2) My G-tube, my 206 bones and the fact that I'm NOT "Mr. Fantastic"/'Reed Richards"/"Rubber-Man"(--'The Fantastic Four')PREVENT/DIS-allow me from committing such a :bone-CRUNCHING" act of FEAR.

3) ONLY my mom's (ANNOYING) canine-companion "SNEAKS" under MY bed.
(It's HARDLY "sneaking", when the dog CONSTANTLY, LOUDLY, RANDOMLY barks.)


...

… MORE 'Titans'-quotes:

… My staff/employees OCCASIONALLY upset me.
So, I guess they could quote the film as a RETORT, whenever I criticize 'em:

"ATTITUDE reflects LEADERSHIP, Captain."


…
Well, "I'm not saying I'm PERFECT, 'cuz I'm NOT.  NONE OF US ARE!  …"


But, I can't/WON'T fault 'em, if they, at least, TRY.

(… I just want to SEE an EFFORT!)


...

To ALL my HATERS/DOUBTERS:

…
"I'm HURT.  I ain't DEAD."
(--'Remember the Titans')


… Those "HATERS" INCLUDE my doctors who said--and I'll QUOTE:
"He (A.J.--I) will spend the rest of his (MY) SHORT life as a 'VEGETABLE'."


Ergo--Hence--Thus, in lieu of my ASTOUNDING, CONTINUING RECOVERY, I say to those now INFAMOUS "DOUBTERS":

"Pardon my French.  But, 'EAT MY ASS!'"


...

MY "motor-vehicle"-ACTIVITY:

…
Y'all: "Can you DRIVE?!"
Me: "I KNOW HOW TO drive.
I choose NOT TO."
(--'The Big Bang Theory')


… It was a WISE MOVE of the government to NOT allow ME to drive an automobile.
Although I HAD my driver's license PRIOR TO my accident, I--RANDOMLY--STRUGGLE with my leg/foot-strength.
Also, my astigmatism is--only SLIGHTLY--WORSE.


...

HOW INSIGHTFUL!

…
(I'm TERRIFIED!)



"What TRADITIONALLY categorizes a person as 'DECENT' is …

FEAR."
(--'Dogma')

Am I … a MAN?!

… No, I am NOT questioning my GENDER!

…
"'Mankind' FEAR what they DON'T understand."
(--'X-Men')

I don't mean to BRAG (Actually, I DO.), but since I'm a TAD BIT of "an ANOMALY"(--my doctors), NO ONE understands me.
ULTIMATELY'CONSEQUENTLY
My LOGIC and REASONING are (metaphorical) "LIGHT-YEARS"  (CONTRARY to what the NAME indicates, they are units of DISTANCE.) "AHEAD of its time".

I have a MUCH LOWER degree of MENTAL-strength of a Dr. Jean Grey, the LACK OF leg-strength of Professor Charles Xavier, the fast-healing ability of Logan/"Wolverine" (NOT fast ENOUGH), , the "four-eyed" (He--TOO--wears glasses.) CONCENTRATION of "Scott Summers"/Cyclops, etc.



So, in CONCLUSION:

As of RIGHT NOW, I'm a HALFIE.


...

Application of the (MY) GREAT work at "NeuroFit 360" (my gym):

…
This evening I went to my dojo.  I viewed some of the Adults' martial arts class.
(I was NOT teaching, JUST OBSERVING.)

After ~60 minutes of OBSERVING some QUALITY techniques, I felt INSPIRED.
As I was leaving, I chose to DISPLAY just HOW I'm IMPROVING!

I slid my butt forward in my wheelchair.
I pulled my legs back, so my hamstrings were TOUCHING my chair.
I leaned my UPPER-body FORWARD and DOWN.

FINALLY, I STOOD MYSELF UP--ALONE, WITHOUT assistance--for ~FOUR SECONDS!
(GRANTED, my legs were touching my wheelchair for support, but they were BARELY TOUCHING it!)
((… I'd say that I did AT LEAST 24.65% TIMES my # of limbs (4 x 24.65 = 98.6%) of the work.))

(… WHAT?!  I like to "SHOW OFF" my PROGRESS!)

YAY!


...

My weight (as of 12/3/13):

…
= 141.6 POUNDS
= ~65.76 KILOGRAMS



I REALLY don't know HOW TO interpret my "body's gravitational 'push' down upon Earth's surface".


Y'all: "Big surprise.
The ONLY thing you KNOW how to do is ASK ME how to do stuff!"
(--'Tommy Boy')

I have "the MIND of a (wrestler).  …
I keep it in a jar on my desk."
(--Stephen King)

My senior year of HIGH SCHOOL, I wrestled at 135 pounds.  So, I WAS rather muscular.
HOWEVER, muscle weighs 2.2 times MORE than fat.

(…
"It's SCIENCE!"--'Anchorman')


...

"You know what hurts the MOST?!"

… "The lack of RESPECT.
Well, that hurts 'the most'.  But, you know what hurts the SECOND-most?
It's the lack of respect."
(--'Dirty Work')


… At my workout--at my FANTASTIC gym, "NeuroFit"--on Monday, my trainer put ALOTTA duct-tape on my lower left thigh to (SOMEHOW) test my stride/nerve-connection.
Unbeknownst to him, he FORGOT to REMOVE the duct-tape from my (HAIRY) leg.
So, I had to "SACK IT UP"(--sang for MALES), "grind my teeth" and RIP OFF said tape that evening in the shower.


But, the actual workout was GREAT--as usual!


...

"AESTHETICALLY PLEASING"-cereal (WORDPLAY)

…
At the PINNACLE of my WRESTLING-career (PRE-accident, PRE-discovery of the wonders of REPEATEDLY imbibing alcohol in SOCIAL-situations, so SENIOR year of high school), I was

"apple-'JACKED'"!
(--'Tosh.O')


...

I just CAN''T seem to "BRUSH THIS DIRT OFF MY SHOULDER"!

…
STRANGELY, I DEVELOPED this SERIOUS "eye-shaking condition" (USUALLY, people are BORN with "nystagmus".  But, I'm FAR from "NORMAL"--METAPHORICALLY.) from MOCKING my brother, when I was ~7 years old.
Karma's a bitch!
(… "Of course I believe in 'karma'.  KARMA's a WORD … like LOVE."--'The Matrix Reloaded')


… DESPITE my sight-problem, I devise ways to "HURDLE the OBSTACLE".
(THAT's just what I DO: Tell me I CAN'T DO SOMETHING, and I'll make you "EAT YOUR WORDS".)
In THIS CASE, I either CLOSE MY EYES for a few seconds, OR I tilt my head to MY RIGHT.
(This tactic is VERY ODD, 'cuz my "nystagmus" is DEFINITELY WORSE in my LEFT eye.
But, I guess my LEFT eye has learned to better "SHOULDER the LOAD" of focused-sight/vision.


… ANYWAY!  I JUST beat the "Expert"-level of "Minesweeper"--WHILE being "fed" via my G-tube.  Also, my eyes were being ESPECIALLY "RAMBUNCTIOUS"!


Until we meet again ….

LOGIC 'nerede'?!

… (THAT was a HALF-English, HALF-Turkish question.)
(… The Turkish word--pronounced 'NEHR-deh'--means 'WHERE'.)
(… Ergo, the topic translates to 'Where's logic?')


… My EVENING-nurse (I employ TWO nurses.), exclaims EVERY DAY that I "MUST BE getting' sick",  JUST because I TEND TO cough, when she begins to feed me my "food" and meds.
Yet, SHE coughs MORE than I DO.
By HER (LACK OF) reasoning, SHE's VERY ILL!
She DOESN'T EVEN cover her mouth, when she has these "episodes".
Thus, SHE's turning MY bedroom into a "germ-CESSPOOL", TEEMING with health-deteriorating bacteria"!





… Oh!  THERE'S the "LOGIC.
When she OPENS my G-tube, PHYSICS (and COMMON SENSE) indicates that AIR now has an open tunnel through which to travel (ENTER/EXIT my body).
(… COUGHING is ONE form of this "air-travel".
Another "form" is GAS.  But, I'll spare y'all the tales of my NOXIOUS fumes.)