-- I HAVE "a BAD-case of 'the MONDAYs'"(--'Office Space')!
ONLY, SAID-affliction actually-works in exact-OPPOSITE ... for ME.
... On any given "MONDAY", I have "SPEECH-Therapy", an INTENSE LEG-workout at 'NeuroFit 360', a viewing of my FAVORITE TV-show 'Scorpion', ... & I PREP-for my "NeuralPsychoTherapy"-session ... every-OTHER week.
(... So, ... ALL GREAT-stuff!)
... "'EXCELLENCE' is NEVER an 'ACCIDENT'. 'Tis the result of HIGH-INTENTION, SINCERE-EFFORT, INTELLIGENT-'DIRECTION', SKILLFUL-EXECUTION & the 'VISION to SEE' 'OBSTACLES' as 'OPPORTUNITIES'."
(--Anonymous)
-- So, I woke-UP "EARLY" this morning (at ~2:15 am PACIFIC Standard Time) ... to "make a 'Urinary-DEPOSIT' at 'the 1st* Lavatorial Bank of Bodily-Releases'".
(... In OTHER-words, "At ~5:15 this morning, I 'WALKED' to my bathroom to ... PISS.")
... APPARENTLY,
my "T.B.I."-caused SUB-par memory > my "NATURAL-inclination" toward NUMERICAL-analysis. ... HAAARUMPF!
(... I.e. During my "WALK"-back--AFTER I "secreted my 'STEADY-flow'", I "KICKED-myself" for "NOT-timing the DURATION of my 'STAND' beside my 'porcelain-THRONE'".)
... HOWEVER, in the EARLY-afternoon, I DID REMEMBER ... to NUMERICALLY-calculate the DURATION of SAID "urinary-DEPOSIT":
(... 'Twas--EXACTLY--13.78 seconds ... PLUS some "shaking".)
(... YAY for MY-REMEMBERING!)
... To feel-BETTER ... about MYSELF, I typed-in
"AJ Valedictorian" on 'Vimeo' & watched it.
(... GOOD-times, good-times! ... I NEEDED that!)
-- Ha ha HA!I saw a rerun of 'SNL' last night that said--on "Weekend-Update",
"Mitt Romney had his 69th birthday recently, ... which--to Mormons--is a SIN."
-- Since my Speech-Therapist is TEMPORARILY "vacationing", (... What's THAT like?! ... I SHRUG.) I did some "LIP- & TONGUE-movement"-exercises ... as per the HOMEWORK she gave me.
-- I've been PONDERING my "social-CHARACTER":
“Would I rather be feared or loved?
...Easy, ... BOTH. I want people to be AFRAID-of how-MUCH they LOVE me."
(--Michael, 'The Office')
-- "Give EVERYTHING your BEST-shot."
(--Muhammad Ali)
... On THAT-note, I kinda "kicked-ASS" working-out at 'NeuroFit 360' today:
... I did an INORDINATE-amount of "WALKING" ... with TURNS/ROTATIONS.
... I exercised my ... ARMS ... A LOT, ... WHILE I STOOD ... 'SANS' WALKER ... for ~15 minutes!
... I demonstrated ALOTTA EXEMPLARY-"side-stepping" during SAID-"turns".
... I exercised my ... ARMS ... A LOT, ... WHILE I STOOD ... 'SANS' WALKER ... for ~15 minutes!
... I demonstrated ALOTTA EXEMPLARY-"side-stepping" during SAID-"turns".
(... WOW! THAT was some TERRIFIC-acting by/of MY "PRETENDING to be-SURPRISED"!)
_______________________________________________
... ('Part of Your World', sung by Ariel in 'The Little Mermaid':)
"Look at this stuff, isn't it neat?
Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has everything?
Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has everything?
Look at this trove, treasures untold
How many wonders can one cavern hold?
Looking around here you'd think
Sure, she's got everything
How many wonders can one cavern hold?
Looking around here you'd think
Sure, she's got everything
I've got gadgets and gizmos a plenty
I've got whozits and whatzits galore
You want thingamabobs? I've got twenty!
But who cares? No big deal,
I want more
I've got whozits and whatzits galore
You want thingamabobs? I've got twenty!
But who cares? No big deal,
I want more
I wanna be where the people are
I wanna see, wanna see them dancing
I wanna see, wanna see them dancing
Walking around on those
What do you call 'em? Oh, feet
What do you call 'em? Oh, feet
Flipping your fins you don't get too far
Legs are required for jumping, dancing
Strolling along down a
What's that word again?
Street
Legs are required for jumping, dancing
Strolling along down a
What's that word again?
Street
Up where they walk, up where they run
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wandering free
Wish I could be, part of that world
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wandering free
Wish I could be, part of that world
What would I give if I could live
Out of these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day
Warm on the sand?
Out of these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day
Warm on the sand?
Betcha' on land, they'd understand
Bet they don't reprimand their daughters
Bright young women, sick of swimming
Ready to stand
Bet they don't reprimand their daughters
Bright young women, sick of swimming
Ready to stand
And I'm ready to know what the people know
Ask 'em my questions
And get some answers
What's a fire and why does it - what's the word?
Burn?
Ask 'em my questions
And get some answers
What's a fire and why does it - what's the word?
Burn?
When's it my turn?
Wouldn't I love, love to explore that shore up above?
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world"
Wouldn't I love, love to explore that shore up above?
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world"
...
(MY-version/-edition/-revision/rendition,
entitled,
'Gotta-Have LEGS':)
"I have all this stuff! Isn't it GRAND?!
(SIGH) Y'all couldN'T under-STAND.
At first it kinda-SEEMS ...
Seems-like I have ... a helluva-LOT.
I have a BIG house ... with lotsa-ROOMS.
My maid-service needs many BROOMS.
Visiting my 'palace' you'd THINK,
'Jeez, ... he's got ... EVERYTHING.'
I've got a pool, & my math's rarely-DIRTY.
I've got wisdom comin' 'out the WAZOO'.
Comfy-bedsets? I've got THIRTY!
But, how can I SEE all-THIS?!
Gotta-have LLLEEEGGGSSS!
I wanna WALK, ... when most-people DO.
I wanna STRUT, ... maybe someday DANCIN'!
Strollin'-around on THOSE
... Those very-strong & -balanced- ... LEGS!
Steerin' my wheelchair doesN'T get me too FAR.
LEGS are a NECESSITY for WALKIN'.
... AFTER I 'WALK', I'll aim-TO ...
... Seems 'FOREIGN' to ME ...
... 'RUN'.
To support my bodily-frame ... STEADYIH-LEE,
To casually-strut ... care-LESS-LEE,
Ambling-FREE,
Wanna RE-'WALK', ... but gotta-have LEGS.
What WILL I SAY, ... WHEN I can PLAY ...
... Just some 'Hop-SCOTCH'?!
What would I SPEND ,... just to have someone LEND ...
... Me his leg-NERVES?!
IF I could better-TALK, 'peeps''d maybe-'GET'
The COMPLEXITY-of MY-'WALKING'.
Where are my 'SPARES'?! Sick of 'CHAIRS',
I've GOTTA-STAND'!
Folks would be AMAZED ... to KNOW what I KNOW!
.... I'll answer QUESTIONS.
Give y'ALL MY ANSWERS.
What's with NERVES, & WHY caN'T I ... what's the WORD?
... TALK?!
WHY caN'T I WALK?!
WouldN'T it be GRAND, ... IF I IGNORED my walker, so I could STAND?!
'Tis MY fan-tuhSEE:
IN-duh-pen-dent-LEE,
GOTTA-Have LEEEEEGSSS!"
... Just some 'Hop-SCOTCH'?!
What would I SPEND ,... just to have someone LEND ...
... Me his leg-NERVES?!
IF I could better-TALK, 'peeps''d maybe-'GET'
The COMPLEXITY-of MY-'WALKING'.
Where are my 'SPARES'?! Sick of 'CHAIRS',
I've GOTTA-STAND'!
Folks would be AMAZED ... to KNOW what I KNOW!
.... I'll answer QUESTIONS.
Give y'ALL MY ANSWERS.
What's with NERVES, & WHY caN'T I ... what's the WORD?
... TALK?!
WHY caN'T I WALK?!
WouldN'T it be GRAND, ... IF I IGNORED my walker, so I could STAND?!
'Tis MY fan-tuhSEE:
IN-duh-pen-dent-LEE,
GOTTA-Have LEEEEEGSSS!"
... Yeah, I'm VERY-comfortable with my VERY-MANLY HETERO-sexuality!
Thus, I have NO-problems with displaying my FONDNESS-for & REVISION-of a
SONG ... from the Walt DISNEY-film, 'The Little MERMAID', ... which is VERY-GIRLY.
... If ANYONE questions my "FLAMBOYANT-MASCULINITY"** ... in December, I WILL-say to SAID-person:
"I'm gonna 'PARK' my 'mistle-FOOT' in your-ASS!"
(--Red Forman, ''That '70s Show'')
-- Yes, I've made mistakes. Life doesn't come with instructions. You just live and you learn.
-- THANKFULLY, my WeekNIGHT-Caregiver is FINALLY CONSISTENTLY-using COMMON-SENSE & LISTENING-to MY/"his BOSS's" requests!
... He's had a ... GREAT-'fortnight'! ("Knock on wood.")
KEY
* = "PLAY-on-WORDS" on/for "going #1" --> "PEEING"
(... Sorry, Mom, for using THAT-term. But, I already-USED/-SAID/-MENTIONED "urinating". ... As a GOOD-writer, I must "display an exemplary-'HANDLE' of SYNONYMS".)
** = 'Twas a DELIBERATE-redundancy!
...
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