"I always thought it would be better to be a FAKE-'somebody' ... than a REAL-'nobody'."

-- Tom Ripley, 'The Talented Mr. Ripley')

--
ME (soliloquy): "If I could just go back... if I could rub everything out... starting with ... MYSELF."
(--Ripley)
(... I'm "TORN", ... 'cuz UP-to July 6th, 2008, ... I had a VERY-DISTINGUISHED list of ACADEMIC-, ATHLETIC- & SOCIAL-accomplishments.  ...
Then, "the 'SHIT' hit the fan".)      


-- I was "feeling-'DOWN'/'BLUE'" recently.  So, I "VENTED" to a VERY-UNDERSTANDING & -SYMPATHETIC "pair of EARS": 
My NeuralPsychoTherapist--to ME: "Everybody should have one talent, what's yours?"
ME: "HHHMMM: ... MENTAL-math, CINEMATIC-quoting & STATISTICAL-analysis."
My NeuralPsychoTherapist's response: "That's THREE. Nobody should have more than ONE talent.
ME: "Whoa, whoa, ... WHOA!  Let me put MY SELF-'analysis' in 'STATISTICAL'-terms, so it could FURTHER-''fly O'ER YOUR-head'': With TYPICAL-"humans" (Read as "NORMEES".), "Notable-RECOVERY from a 'T.B.I.'" "GUESS-timates" at an ~0.003% --> ~3 in 10,000.  
... But, with MY indefatigable MENTAL-aptitude & INGENIOUS BIOphysical-applications, ... the "REHAB-likelihood" INcreases ALL-the-way UP-to ~16.667% 
--> ~1 in 6.  



-- Today, I had the DISTINGUISHED-HONOR of attending the "Professional Association of Martial Arts Instructors" (P.A.M.A.I.) (referred-to as "Pam-EE").

... UN-fortunately, I could NOT--PHYSICALLY--"participate".  BUT, 'twas VERY-ENLIGHTENING to watch ... & LEARN-from the HEAD-/MAIN-Instructor of the 'Shoreiru'- & 'Shuriru'-systems!

... DAMN my "SPOTTY"/'SUB-par" memory for FORGETTING the EXACT-stats!  (... O'sensei Roensche is ALSO a MEDICAL-Service Technician.)  But, his TEACHINGS ALWAYS-display a UNIQUE-combination of biophysical-FACTS with "martial arts"-PRINCIPLES!


-- I THOROUGHLY-ENJOYED RE-watching the INSPIRING wrestling-drama 'Vision Quest'!
((... 
"My name's (Altan, ... Altan Kaynatma).   Last week I turned (30). I wasn't ready for it. I haven't done anything yet. So I made this deal with myself. This is the year I make my mark."
(--Louden Swain/PROTAGONIST, Vision Quest'))

(... During my 8-year "AMATEUR wrestling-career", MY PRIDE, SKILLS & "HEART" ONLY-"allowed" me to LOSINGLY-"get-PINNED" ... 11 times ... in ~280 matches.)

((... DOCTORS "CLAIM" I have a "T.B.I.", but "I'm just the victim of a screwed-up nitrogen imbalance. Plus, I think I've contracted 'priapism'."   
My housemate: "What's 'PRIAPISM'?" 
ME: "It's a disease of a constant erection. I read about it in my 'Rare-Diseases' book.)
(--'Vision Quest'))  

... "It's NOT the SIZE of the 'dog' in the FIGHT.  ... It's the AMOUNT of FIGHT in the 'dog'!"
(--Adam Richman, 'Man vs. Food')
(... I've NEVER-been a BIG-guy ... in stature.  But, I've ALWAYS-"CARRIED-/PRESENTED-myself" PROUDLY, ... 'cuz I KNOW the BIO-PHYSICS of PROPER-/"UN-wasted"-ENERGY.)
(... MY wrestling WEIGHT-classes in high school AND college: 
119, 125, 130, 135, ... 141, 141, 149, 149)              

... There were/are NO-"cheerleaders" at WRESTLING-matches.
(... In MY-valedictory, I THANKED "the SIX-fans" who actually-ATTENDED "MY WRESTLING-matches".  ... That-number INCLUDED my parents!)    


-- Last night I watched the DOMINANT- ... yet, DISCIPLINED-play of the "U.S.W.N.T." (United States Women's National Team) in their 5-0 VICTORY-OVER Trinidad & Tobago ... to qualify for the Rio-Olympics.

... As a FORMER STAR-soccer player for ~three seasons in my YOUTH, I VERY-MUCH ENJOY watching, understanding & critiquing 'FUTBOL'-strategies!
(... I was ALWAYS the LEFT-midfielder.  ... Ergo, I was TRUSTED to-be--for my THREE DIFFERENT-teams--BOTH a "CO-creator on OFFENSE" AND the "INITIAL-/PRIMARY-defender in 'PROTECTING my goal'".)
(... INTUITIVELY, I "WUZ" MORE-about "goal-DISTRIBUTION"/ASSISTS than I EVER-was about "goal-SCORING" AND/OR "goal-PREVENTION".)  

... I HONESTLY wouldN'T be SURPRISED, if the American-WOMEN's SOCCER-team BEAT the American-MEN's SOCCER-team ... in a head-to-head match.
(... The U.S.A. MEN MAY-be VERY-talented in BASKETBALL  & BASEBALL.  But, I will NEVER-"RESPECT" 'em in SOCCER!)
(... Hence the term: "EUROPEAN-'futbol'")

...