... PLUS, the FACT that I ... "FELL-for" ... an oldER woman--METAPHORICALLY/ROMANTICALLY--FURTHER-appropriates THIS film-CHOICE.
-- So, I "got-to THINKIN'":
A-LOT of what I DO is ... NOT "IL-legal", just ... "FROWNED-upon" by the "'SQUARE'-community". NONETHELESS/REGARDLESS, "there IS a METHOD to MY 'MADNESS'". THUS, I SEEK a ... "THUGGED-out 'HEAVEN'":
"Gangsta's Paradise"
(by Coolio)
"As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I take a look at my life and realize there's nothin' left
'Cause I've been blasting and laughing so long,
That even my mama thinks that my mind is gone
But I ain't never crossed a man that didn't deserve it
Me be treated like a punk you know that's unheard of
You better watch how you're talking and where you're walking
Or you and your homies might be lined in chalk
I really hate to trip but I gotta loc
As they croak, I see myself in the pistol smoke, fool
I'm the kinda G the little homies wanna be like
On my knees in the night saying prayers in the streetlight
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Look at the situation they got me facin'
I can't live a normal life, I was raised by the streets
So I gotta be down with the hood team
Too much television watching got me chasing dreams
I'm an educated fool with money on my mind
Got my 10 in my hand and a gleam in my eye
I'm a loc'd out gangsta set trippin' banger
And my homies is down so don't arouse my anger, fool
Death ain't nothing but a heartbeat away,
I'm living life, do or die, what can I say
I'm 23 now, but will I live to see 24
The way things are going I don't know
Tell me why are we so blind to see
That the ones we hurt are you and me
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Power and the money, money and the power
Minute after minute, hour after hour
Everybody's running, but half of them ain't looking
What's going on in the kitchen, but I don't know what's cookin'
They say I gotta learn, but nobody's here to teach me
If they can't understand it, how can they reach me
I guess they can't, I guess they won't
I guess they front, that's why I know my life is out of luck, fool
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Tell me why are we so blind to see
That the ones we hurt are you and me
Tell me why are we so blind to see
That the ones we hurt are you and me"
[Fade out]
_______________________________________________
'AMISH Paradise'
"As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
I've churned butter once or twice
Living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Living in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree, I really look good in black...fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired
There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
Not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe
It's as primitive as can be
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice
Living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice
Living in an Amish paradise
Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights
Living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Living in an Amish paradise"
_______________________________________________
-- Of COURSE, THIS song was ALREADY-parodied .... by the LEGENDARY "Weird Al Yankovic" ... in HIS 'Amish Paradise'.
(... So, I "tinkered-WITH" BOTH.)
"As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
I've churned butter once or twice
Living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Living in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree, I really look good in black...fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired
There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
Not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe
It's as primitive as can be
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice
Living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice
Living in an Amish paradise
Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights
Living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Living in an Amish paradise"
_______________________________________________
-- MY version/rendition, entitled
''Weirdo's End-LESS Quest'':
-- "EVERYTHING CAN-be TAKEN-from a man but ONE thing: the LAST of human-FREEDOMS--to CHOOSE one's ATTITUDE in ANY given set of circumstances; to CHOOSE one's OWN-way."
(--Viktor E. Frankl)
-- DoN'T BELITTLE or DISMISS or CRITICIZE MY-DREAMS!
... "There are seven DAYS in a/the WEEK, &
'Someday' isN'T one of 'em."
(--UNKNOWN)
... MY INFAMOUS-/NOTORIOUS-/CATASTROPHIC-accident was ... 2,821 DAYS ago. Thus, it's been at-LEAST THAT-LONG, since I've gotten a ... "day of REST".
(... HAAARUMPF!)
... "'TOMORROW' STARTS-with 'TODAY'!"
(--Altan Kaynatma)
... "Do-NOT confuse
'the ability to PREDICT'
with
'the ability to CONTROL'."
(--Larry, 'NUMB3RS')
(... INITIALLY, I "PREDICTED" I'd--EVENTUALLY--"DEFEAT" my "T.B.I." ... NOW, after MUCH "ENCOURAGING-progress", I can "CONTROL" my--EVENTUAL--"WIN"!)
-- "You will never CHANGE your LIFE, until you CHANGE something you do DAILY. ... The secret of your SUCCESS is found in your DAILY-routine."
(--John C. Maxwell)
... Ergo, I STARTED (yesterday) to do
-- "The ability to DISCIPLINE yourself to DELAY gratification in the SHORT-term in order to enjoy greatER-rewards in the LONG-term, is the indispensable PRErequisite for 'SUCCESS'."
(--Brian Tracy)
... "'DISCIPLINE' is the BRIDGE between 'GOALS' & 'ACCOMPLISHMENT'."
(--Jim Rohm)
-- Last, but NOT-least, ... HAPPY EASTER!
KEY
* = 'Tis NOT-popular to deem MYSELF a "CRIPPLE". Ergo, KNOWING my COUNTLESS "ODD-ities", I ACCEPT the ALTERNATIVE (TWO-syllabled) "title".
_______________________________________________
-- The ABOVE-writing was MOSTLY-done, BEFORE I went-OUT to my housemate's PARENTS' house for an Easter-dinner GATHERING ... with his mom, step-dad, sister, brother-in-law & niece.
... I ATE a FEW bites of chicken.
...
"As I drive my 'CHAIR' down the street to CLASS,
I take a look at my shoulder-scar & realize I'm just like GLASS.
But, THAT's just-PERFECT for SEN-SIH-tih-vih-TEE.
'Tis NOT that I'm MEAN. I just LACK hem-PAH-THEE.
By six o'clock in the morning, I'm ex-er-SIZE-in'.
By the END of my 'TESTS', my HIPS'll be RIZE-in'. FOOL!
But, I've been STANDIN' & SITTIN' so much THAT
Even my brother in Turkey can 'SEE' when I TIRE!
I'm ob-SESSED with NUMBERS. I rih-LATE 'em to ALL
With-OUT ANY fear of a MISTAKE's causing a BRAWL!
But, MATH's so-TOUGH. So, how can I be so-SURE?!
... Well, the numbers are 'SOUND', & my LOGIC is PURE!
I've been spendin' WAY too-LONG,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I 'GUESS & CHECK' FREE-QUENT-LEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I can get NO EM-PAH-THEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
GREAT prah-gress my guests will-SEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I STARTED-to STAND ... but fell-back. So, what. I TRIED.
I just SHUT my eyes, POSTULATED an ALTERNATIVE & SIGHED.
I shaN'T just-QUIT. In FACT, I'm doin' WELL!
... I USED-to DESPERATELY search-FOR one with LEGS to SELL.
But, I'll NEVER give-UP, even IF 'odds Of SUCCESS' seem BLEAK.
But, provin' doubters WRONG is 'just what I DO.
WALKIN' with a 'T.B.I.'?! THAT's just UNHEARD-OF!
I NEVER say 'never', so gimme a CHANCE.
My homies ALL agree, ... I should patent a dance. FOOL!
If y'ALL watch my 'WALK', you'll deafen me with 'WOW's!
My SLIGHT-grunts--while 'WALKING' are CALMING ... like a cat's 'me-OW's.
I'm DEFINITELY-NOT 'dumb', so please doN'T point & STARE.
I'm JUST 'verbally-IMPAIRED'.
My LEG-nerves have ALL been DAMAGED.
No more WAH-KING-TEK-NEEK.
Like CLUMSY-'Paul BunYAN',
I'm 'FAR-from ... SLEEK!
I've been BUSY RE-SENT-LEE,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I RARELY-sleep, 'cuz I'm ALWAYS-THINKIN' AND
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I've no-time for RE-LAY-SHEN-SHIPS,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I STRIVE-to INSPIRE other 'CRIPS',
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
Usin' my MOMENTUM, lengthenin' my GAIT,
FOCUSED-on my 'pigeon-toe', soon I'll turn it STRAIGHT.
Think you're CREATIVE? Think you're really-SMART?!
Well, I KNOW I'm seh-ven MILLION times as thou ART!
I'll be the WALKING-guy all the 'CHAIR-folk' wanna be-LIKE!
WHEN I stumble while 'WALKING', ... RELAX! 'Tis JUST a BIG-PSYCHE!
So, doN'T DOUBT me ... with PESS-ih-MISS-ISM!
I'm ALWAYS-thinkin' MATH. Like, I see my housemate as a rectangular-PRISM.
I'd kinda-like a day-OFF ... FROM
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I'm JUST a WACKY MATH-MATICIAN,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
'For the WEARY, there IS no-REST!'
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I must-ALWAYS give it my-BEST!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!"
_______________________________________________
I take a look at my shoulder-scar & realize I'm just like GLASS.
But, THAT's just-PERFECT for SEN-SIH-tih-vih-TEE.
'Tis NOT that I'm MEAN. I just LACK hem-PAH-THEE.
By six o'clock in the morning, I'm ex-er-SIZE-in'.
By the END of my 'TESTS', my HIPS'll be RIZE-in'. FOOL!
But, I've been STANDIN' & SITTIN' so much THAT
Even my brother in Turkey can 'SEE' when I TIRE!
I'm ob-SESSED with NUMBERS. I rih-LATE 'em to ALL
With-OUT ANY fear of a MISTAKE's causing a BRAWL!
But, MATH's so-TOUGH. So, how can I be so-SURE?!
... Well, the numbers are 'SOUND', & my LOGIC is PURE!
I've been spendin' WAY too-LONG,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I 'GUESS & CHECK' FREE-QUENT-LEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I can get NO EM-PAH-THEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
GREAT prah-gress my guests will-SEE!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I STARTED-to STAND ... but fell-back. So, what. I TRIED.
I just SHUT my eyes, POSTULATED an ALTERNATIVE & SIGHED.
I shaN'T just-QUIT. In FACT, I'm doin' WELL!
... I USED-to DESPERATELY search-FOR one with LEGS to SELL.
But, I'll NEVER give-UP, even IF 'odds Of SUCCESS' seem BLEAK.
But, provin' doubters WRONG is 'just what I DO.
WALKIN' with a 'T.B.I.'?! THAT's just UNHEARD-OF!
I NEVER say 'never', so gimme a CHANCE.
My homies ALL agree, ... I should patent a dance. FOOL!
If y'ALL watch my 'WALK', you'll deafen me with 'WOW's!
My SLIGHT-grunts--while 'WALKING' are CALMING ... like a cat's 'me-OW's.
I'm DEFINITELY-NOT 'dumb', so please doN'T point & STARE.
I'm JUST 'verbally-IMPAIRED'.
My LEG-nerves have ALL been DAMAGED.
No more WAH-KING-TEK-NEEK.
Like CLUMSY-'Paul BunYAN',
I'm 'FAR-from ... SLEEK!
I've been BUSY RE-SENT-LEE,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I RARELY-sleep, 'cuz I'm ALWAYS-THINKIN' AND
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I've no-time for RE-LAY-SHEN-SHIPS,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I STRIVE-to INSPIRE other 'CRIPS',
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
Usin' my MOMENTUM, lengthenin' my GAIT,
FOCUSED-on my 'pigeon-toe', soon I'll turn it STRAIGHT.
Think you're CREATIVE? Think you're really-SMART?!
Well, I KNOW I'm seh-ven MILLION times as thou ART!
I'll be the WALKING-guy all the 'CHAIR-folk' wanna be-LIKE!
WHEN I stumble while 'WALKING', ... RELAX! 'Tis JUST a BIG-PSYCHE!
So, doN'T DOUBT me ... with PESS-ih-MISS-ISM!
I'm ALWAYS-thinkin' MATH. Like, I see my housemate as a rectangular-PRISM.
I'd kinda-like a day-OFF ... FROM
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I'm JUST a WACKY MATH-MATICIAN,
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
'For the WEARY, there IS no-REST!'
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!
I must-ALWAYS give it my-BEST!
''Workin''-ON my 'end-LESS QUEST'!"
_______________________________________________
-- "EVERYTHING CAN-be TAKEN-from a man but ONE thing: the LAST of human-FREEDOMS--to CHOOSE one's ATTITUDE in ANY given set of circumstances; to CHOOSE one's OWN-way."
(--Viktor E. Frankl)
-- DoN'T BELITTLE or DISMISS or CRITICIZE MY-DREAMS!
... "There are seven DAYS in a/the WEEK, &
'Someday' isN'T one of 'em."
(--UNKNOWN)
... MY INFAMOUS-/NOTORIOUS-/CATASTROPHIC-accident was ... 2,821 DAYS ago. Thus, it's been at-LEAST THAT-LONG, since I've gotten a ... "day of REST".
(... HAAARUMPF!)
... "'TOMORROW' STARTS-with 'TODAY'!"
(--Altan Kaynatma)
... "Do-NOT confuse
'the ability to PREDICT'
with
'the ability to CONTROL'."
(--Larry, 'NUMB3RS')
(... INITIALLY, I "PREDICTED" I'd--EVENTUALLY--"DEFEAT" my "T.B.I." ... NOW, after MUCH "ENCOURAGING-progress", I can "CONTROL" my--EVENTUAL--"WIN"!)
-- "You will never CHANGE your LIFE, until you CHANGE something you do DAILY. ... The secret of your SUCCESS is found in your DAILY-routine."
(--John C. Maxwell)
... Ergo, I STARTED (yesterday) to do
3 SETS of 50 "CRUNCHES" every morning ... BETWEEN my FIRST "meal" & "SECOND-breakfast".
(... Fingers CROSSSED ... & LEGS ... & EYES)
-- "The ability to DISCIPLINE yourself to DELAY gratification in the SHORT-term in order to enjoy greatER-rewards in the LONG-term, is the indispensable PRErequisite for 'SUCCESS'."
(--Brian Tracy)
... "'DISCIPLINE' is the BRIDGE between 'GOALS' & 'ACCOMPLISHMENT'."
(--Jim Rohm)
-- Last, but NOT-least, ... HAPPY EASTER!
KEY
* = 'Tis NOT-popular to deem MYSELF a "CRIPPLE". Ergo, KNOWING my COUNTLESS "ODD-ities", I ACCEPT the ALTERNATIVE (TWO-syllabled) "title".
_______________________________________________
-- The ABOVE-writing was MOSTLY-done, BEFORE I went-OUT to my housemate's PARENTS' house for an Easter-dinner GATHERING ... with his mom, step-dad, sister, brother-in-law & niece.
... I ATE a FEW bites of chicken.
...
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