(--WEIRDO Dr. Sheldon Cooper, 'The Big Bang Theory')
…
Peter: "Anyone at your work ever say: ''Looks like SOMEONE's got a case of the 'Mondays'!''?"
Lawrence: "NAW, man! You'd get your 'ASS-kicked' for sayin' somethin' like THAT."
(--'Office Space')
Blog-CREATOR to ME: "(A,J) WHAT's … happenin'? (SIGH) We've gotta talk about your 'TPS-reports'."
(--Lumbergh, 'Office Space')
ME: "'TPS-reports'? Like MY 'Traumatic Physical Suffering'-essays
OR
MY 'Total Psychosomatic Silliness'
OR
MY 'Terrible Personal Suicide'
OR
MY 'Traumatic Psychological-Stiffness'?!"
…
I'll ADMIT:
I'm QUITE the RANDOM, "STEE-RANGE", INSIGHTFUL "SMARTY-pants"!
I--ALWAYS--have "INFINITE" subjects/topics/issues "RUNNING through my mind" … 'cuz THAT's just how I "function"/"operate".
I like/PREFER to "MULTI-task". I NEED as MANY time-SAVING techniques as POSSIBLE!
… My mother CLAIMS that "when MOST people 'MULTI-task', NOTHING gets the MAXIMUM-effort".
Yes, this is true--in THEORY.
But, I'd think that she's known ME for long enough
(10,983 days = 30 years, 3 weeks & 5 days) to REALIZE/KNOW that I am "a BIT" (Read: "A LOT")
(… That was "REVERSE-hyperbole".) of an ANOMALY.
I am QUITE UNIQUE--in a GOOD way (MOSTLY).
… I am UNLIKE "MOST people".
I--STRONGLY--believe/KNOW that NUMBERS can "APPLY to"/explain ANY--LOGICAL--conclusion.
((.. THIS mathematical-/numerical-REASONING MAY help explain WHY/HOW I could "ACE" "Advanced-Placement Calculus BC ("2nd-level Calculus--out of 2") while SIMULTANEOUSLY "ACING" "Advanced-Placement STATISTICS".
BONUS: Said mathematical-"DOUBLE feat" occurred whilst I was MERELY a senior … in HIGH SCHOOL!
BEFORE every task I undertake, I first calculate "the odds of SUCCESS versus the odds of FAILURE … using my current strategy".
(… To a "NORMEE", this ADDITIONAL problem-solving would take ENTIRELY TOO MUCH EXTRA-time to be WORTH the "TROUBLE".)
(… But, PERSONALLY--as a PROVEN "ANOMALY", I WELCOME … & LOVE the--NECESSARY--"number-CRUNCHING".)
… As an AVID/FANATICAL SPORTS-viewer … & -partipant,
'tis "SAD" that MY MOOD is SO AFFECTED by the "PERFORMANCE" of my teams.
However, my attitude LATELY has been SLIGHTLY-BETTER than usual, 'cuz MOST of "MY teams"' "putting-up BETTER #s". (… FOREIGN & DOMESTIC … teams)
(… "Knock on wood.")
… I think that my "(VERY) QUICK NUMERICAL-deductions" played a MINOR-role in my WRESTLING-, SOCCER-, FOOTBALL- & BASKETBALL- SUCCESS/GLORY!
(… In a WRESTLING-match, if I am "on BOTTOM" & TRAILING by TWO at the BEGINNING of the THIRD-period, then I--almost INSTANTANEOUSLY--KNOW that I NEED TO "score an 'ESCAPE' for 1 point", "RELEASE him … to give HIM a point", then--FINALLY--"secure the last 'TAKEDOWN' for the FINAL 2 points"--ALL in the last two REGULATION-minutes to force OVERTIME.)
(… OR, I COULD just "secure a 'REVERSAL' for 2 points"& apply DEFENSIVE-"pressure" for the LAST two minutes to AVOID TWO "STALLING-penalties … the SECOND of which would be a "STALLING-penalty" to give HIM ONE point.)
…
"Back in the day(S)--PRE-accident, I'd--OFTEN/FREQUENTLY--"conduct LENGTHY, SOPHISTICATED, MOTIVATING conversations--with MYSELF:
((… EXAMPLE-opening: "Hey, (A.J.)! How ya DOIN'? … Just REMEMBER:
''I'm GOOD-enough. I'm SMART-enough. And, DOGGONE IT, people LIKE me.''"
(--'Daily Affirmation with Stuart Smalley'on OLD-SCHOOL 'S.N.L.'))
(INTERNAL-soliloquoy:) "Would YOU rather 'travel the WORLD' WITH your 'SIGNIFICANT-other' OR 'STAY--relatively--SITUATED' & open/operate YOUR OWN martial arts dojo?"
…
In honor of TODAY's DATE, (I am NOT ashamed/embarrassed of my "LITHP".)
"May the FO(U)RTH be with you."
(… 'Twas "'Star Wars'-Day" today.)
…
"There is no 'OFF-position' on the 'GENIUS-switch'."
(--David Letterman)
...
I'll ADMIT:
I'm QUITE the RANDOM, "STEE-RANGE", INSIGHTFUL "SMARTY-pants"!
I--ALWAYS--have "INFINITE" subjects/topics/issues "RUNNING through my mind" … 'cuz THAT's just how I "function"/"operate".
I like/PREFER to "MULTI-task". I NEED as MANY time-SAVING techniques as POSSIBLE!
… My mother CLAIMS that "when MOST people 'MULTI-task', NOTHING gets the MAXIMUM-effort".
Yes, this is true--in THEORY.
But, I'd think that she's known ME for long enough
(10,983 days = 30 years, 3 weeks & 5 days) to REALIZE/KNOW that I am "a BIT" (Read: "A LOT")
(… That was "REVERSE-hyperbole".) of an ANOMALY.
I am QUITE UNIQUE--in a GOOD way (MOSTLY).
… I am UNLIKE "MOST people".
I--STRONGLY--believe/KNOW that NUMBERS can "APPLY to"/explain ANY--LOGICAL--conclusion.
((.. THIS mathematical-/numerical-REASONING MAY help explain WHY/HOW I could "ACE" "Advanced-Placement Calculus BC ("2nd-level Calculus--out of 2") while SIMULTANEOUSLY "ACING" "Advanced-Placement STATISTICS".
BONUS: Said mathematical-"DOUBLE feat" occurred whilst I was MERELY a senior … in HIGH SCHOOL!
BEFORE every task I undertake, I first calculate "the odds of SUCCESS versus the odds of FAILURE … using my current strategy".
(… To a "NORMEE", this ADDITIONAL problem-solving would take ENTIRELY TOO MUCH EXTRA-time to be WORTH the "TROUBLE".)
(… But, PERSONALLY--as a PROVEN "ANOMALY", I WELCOME … & LOVE the--NECESSARY--"number-CRUNCHING".)
… As an AVID/FANATICAL SPORTS-viewer … & -partipant,
'tis "SAD" that MY MOOD is SO AFFECTED by the "PERFORMANCE" of my teams.
However, my attitude LATELY has been SLIGHTLY-BETTER than usual, 'cuz MOST of "MY teams"' "putting-up BETTER #s". (… FOREIGN & DOMESTIC … teams)
(… "Knock on wood.")
… I think that my "(VERY) QUICK NUMERICAL-deductions" played a MINOR-role in my WRESTLING-, SOCCER-, FOOTBALL- & BASKETBALL- SUCCESS/GLORY!
(… In a WRESTLING-match, if I am "on BOTTOM" & TRAILING by TWO at the BEGINNING of the THIRD-period, then I--almost INSTANTANEOUSLY--KNOW that I NEED TO "score an 'ESCAPE' for 1 point", "RELEASE him … to give HIM a point", then--FINALLY--"secure the last 'TAKEDOWN' for the FINAL 2 points"--ALL in the last two REGULATION-minutes to force OVERTIME.)
(… OR, I COULD just "secure a 'REVERSAL' for 2 points"& apply DEFENSIVE-"pressure" for the LAST two minutes to AVOID TWO "STALLING-penalties … the SECOND of which would be a "STALLING-penalty" to give HIM ONE point.)
…
"Back in the day(S)--PRE-accident, I'd--OFTEN/FREQUENTLY--"conduct LENGTHY, SOPHISTICATED, MOTIVATING conversations--with MYSELF:
((… EXAMPLE-opening: "Hey, (A.J.)! How ya DOIN'? … Just REMEMBER:
''I'm GOOD-enough. I'm SMART-enough. And, DOGGONE IT, people LIKE me.''"
(--'Daily Affirmation with Stuart Smalley'on OLD-SCHOOL 'S.N.L.'))
(INTERNAL-soliloquoy:) "Would YOU rather 'travel the WORLD' WITH your 'SIGNIFICANT-other' OR 'STAY--relatively--SITUATED' & open/operate YOUR OWN martial arts dojo?"
…
In honor of TODAY's DATE, (I am NOT ashamed/embarrassed of my "LITHP".)
"May the FO(U)RTH be with you."
(… 'Twas "'Star Wars'-Day" today.)
…
"There is no 'OFF-position' on the 'GENIUS-switch'."
(--David Letterman)
...
No comments:
Post a Comment